Running away?

          Upon meeting me and finding out that I came to live here  in Croatia for almost three years without knowing anyone, a friend asked me,” What are you running away from.” Although he was joking, I have not forgotten those words. At the time I explained that I wanted adventure and to learn a new language and culture. But now, I am not so sure. You see, I was in such a hurry to leave the country. I knew my project would not start until May (now June), but I could not imagine staying in the United States any longer than I had to so I found an interim project. I didn’t really care what I was doing, but I had to leave. But why? Why was I so desperate to leave?

            I think part of the reason was that I was mad that I was graduating college. As silly as it seems, somehow I thought that if I could not stay in college, then I needed to be as far away as possible. I wanted to sound like I was doing exciting, important things in an exciting place. Anywhere in the U.S. did not seem exciting enough. And so I jumped on the chance to come here to Croatia without knowing really at all what I was getting into. I knew that if might be hard to be away for so long, but I figured it was all part of the great adventure.

            But now I am here. And reality has set in. My life isn’t glamorous, and it is not all that exciting. I currently work in a library doing work, which makes me feel like a robot. I will move in June and finally work with a peace organization, but even that does not bring excitement as the lack of expectations and even a job description scares me. As I go through what has become my normal routine, I wonder what good am I doing here? I am so far from the people I love most and the place where I feel like I could make an actual difference. I think about the real reasons I came here and I find myself wondering if I made the wrong decision. Was I really just running away? And if so, should I even stay?

            These are not easy questions and over the last few weeks I have struggled with the answers. I don’t regret coming, though. Even if I was running away, I would not have been satisfied staying in the U.S. I needed a change and I needed to try something new. And even though it has been hard at times, the experience here has been good. I have learned a lot about myself and gotten to see a new part of the world. The traveling and the relationships I have made have made it well worth my time.

            As I met with a Croatian friend over desert last night, I realized how much of a life I have created for myself here. I have a Croatian residence permit and a bank account. But even more than that, I have people I care about and people who care about me. I might not enjoy my current job, but I love the people I work with. I have formed some very close relationships that continue to grow. Just last week, I went on a day trip to Novi Sad (the second largest city in Serbia) with my good friend Debora. We had the best day walking around and talking.

I have the world’s greatest tutor! Seriously, just yesterday we ended up talking for an hour longer than the lesson time just about life. As much as I appreciate learning Croatian from her, I love even more the friendship that we have. I also have made a new friend who is from England and have enjoyed having someone my own age to talk to and hang out with who understands how hard it is to live in another country by yourself.

I have also become involved in more activities now. I run with a running club every Thursday by the river. They always time the run and even though I am one of the slowest, I have begun to meet other runners and find my own spot in the group. On Wednesday mornings, I have begun to teach an English class. I only have two students, but it has been a nice change to plan and teach lessons, something I had never done before. Oat least once a week I meet people for coffee and try to learn more about Croatia from Croatians.

And so I plan on staying. I no longer am starry-eyed and excited for whatever happens, but I want to give my new project a try and I want to continue to build a life for myself here in Croatia. There have been times when I have hated it here and just wanted to go home. But for the most part, I am content with my life here… I try to look for the positive and continue to learn new things every day. I know that things will not be easy and there will still be times when I will wonder if this is all worth it. And the time might come when it is not. It will not mean that I failed in this adventure or that I am not suited for life outside the United States, but that the placement and the time is not right. But for now, I am here for two more years and I want to make the most of it. 

My Osijek

          I have now lived in Croatia for almost five months and thus I have learned a lot about this country. One way in which I have tried to learn more is to ask many questions to Croatians. One of these questions is "what is your favorite thing about Croatia?" One of the answers that always comes up is the beautiful coastline. And I have to agree, Croatia's coastline is beautiful. There are also great mountains and waterfalls and Zagreb, the capital city, is a really cool city with much to do. However, I don't live near the coast, I don't live near mountains or waterfalls, and I don't live in Zagreb. I live in Osijek, a city in the east, where the largest hill is the pedestrian bridge. It is the fourth largest city in Croatia with a population around 100,000 people, but it still feels very much like a small town. Not a whole lot happens here and I have to admit, that for a while I was frustrated that out of all the places in this beautiful country, I ended up in Osijek. 

          But the more I have explored, the more I have gotten to know people, the more history I have learned, the more I have come to like Osijek. And a few weeks ago as I showed my friend Becca around, I realized that I have made this city my home. I might not be living here much longer, but I will come back to visit. And even though Osijek is not exactly a tourist destination and it does not take too long to see all the sights, Osijek does have a lot to offer. And to prove it, I thought I would give you a virtual tour. 

The cathedral on the main square

"European Avenue" with its old mansions from Austro-Hungarian times.

Tvrđa with old city walls still intact. 

Unique churches.

Iconic statues.

And my favorite, the beautiful riverwalk on the Drava. 

This is my Osijek. 

23 Countries in 23 Years

        Last week, I was so excited to have my friend Becca come visit! Becca is a current EMU student who is studying this year in Germany. We had several classes together and share a lot of the same friends, even though we became very close at EMU. But still, when I knew that she would be in Europe, I convinced her that she should come on over to Croatia… and she did! She flew into Zagreb and then took a bus here to Osijek. We spent a day wandering around Osijek before taking a bus up to Pecs, Hungary.

         In Pecs, and then in Budapest, we stayed with couch surfers! For those who do not know, Couchsurfing is an online community in which people who love to travel and learn about new places and cultures join. Then you can do three different things: HOST – if you have a couch or an extra bed, you can let travelers come stay with you; SURF – instead of staying in a hotel or hostel, you can stay with local people on their couches; or just meet-up. As I mentioned in an earlier post, I have been meeting with local couch surfers here in Osijek.

          For this trip, I had read through different profiles of couch surfers, then sent out requests for us to stay with local hosts. It was a great experience! We did not have a lot of time in Pecs, but our host served us breakfast and then gave us a city tour. I really enjoyed seeing the city from a local perspective and being able to ask all sorts of questions about Hungarian life. I also loved our host in Budapest! He was our age and lived in a great part of the city and I really enjoyed the conversations we had and the places we saw with him.

          After just a short time in Budapest, we took an eight hour train ride to Belgrade. Although it was long, we were in a really nice train car and I got to have a good conversation with a Serbian. (Having good conversations with strangers and getting to know new places and cultures through them is one of my favorite parts of traveling!) In Belgrade, we took a walking tour, explored an old fortress, ate local food, and enjoyed relaxing in cafes. I immediately fell in love the city and am already planning my next visit so I can explore more. On Wednesday afternoon, we caught a bus back to Osijek (only 3.5 hours) and then Becca caught an early bus back to Zagreb the next morning to fly back to Germany.

         We had a really good time and it was nice to show someone my part of the world. Plus, I was really excited to go to Serbia for the first time. You see, Serbia is the 23^rd country I have been in and I am 23 years old! I think this is pretty cool! I thought it would be fun to share with you all the countries I have traveled to, along with the year in which I first visited.

1) Canada - 1999     2) Mexico – 2006     3) Bahamas – 2009     4) Nicaragua – 2009 

5) Belgium – 2011     6) France – 2011     7) Germany – 2011      8) The Netherlands – 2011

9) Italy - 2011     10) Switzerland – 2011     11) Liechtenstein – 2011     12) Austria – 2011

13) Luxembourg – 2011     14) Ireland – 2011     15) Northern Ireland – 2011          

16) Turkey – 2012      17) Iraq – 2012      18) Slovenia – 2013     19) Croatia – 2013            

20) Bosnia and Herzegovina – 2013      21) Slovakia – 2014     22) Hungary – 2014            

23) Serbia - 2014

My Mom

          Greetings from Belgrade! Although I have many things to tell of my current travels, this blog is for my mom. Today, March 5, is her birthday. I hope if you read my Valentine’s Day blog, you already know much about my mom and how much I appreciated the way I grew up, always feeling supported and loved by both of my parents. What you might not know, is that my mom and I are opposites when it comes to personality. I am an ENFP, she is an ISTJ, if you know the Meyer’s Briggs test. I love history, big ideas, and am wildly idealistic. She is a former math teacher who thinks in more practical terms. Sometimes when I ask her a question such as, “Mom, have you ever thought how inconvenient it would be to be a giraffe and have such a long neck?” or something of the sort, she will just look at me and wonder where I came from because she would never think of such things. (Then we look at my dad and realize where the genes came from).

          But even though we are different, there is usually no one I would rather spend time with. My mom is the most loving, caring person I know. She is still the first I call when I am having a bad day. She is also the first one I call when I have big, exciting news. Through all my dreaming and crazy ups and downs, she has always been there. Sometimes she helps me rationally think through situations. In other times, she just listens and holds me when I cry. We love to watch movies together, go shopping together, and just talk. I can always be myself around her because she knows me probably better than I know myself. She is a strong, amazing woman who looks to see the best in everyone. I have learned what it means to truly love my neighbor and my enemies by looking to her example. She is a much better person than I am, and I can only hope that someday I will have as much love and wisdom to give.

Mom, there is so much to say, but I think the Backstreet Boys say it best…

It takes a lot to know what is love

It's not the big things, but the little things

That can mean enough

A lot of prayers to get me through

And there is never a day that passes by

I don't think of you

You were always there for me

Pushing me and guiding me

Always to succeed

You showed me

When I was young just how to grow

You showed me

Everything that I should know

You showed me

Just how to walk without your hands

Cuz mom you always were

The perfect fan

God has been so good

Blessing me with a family

Who did all they could

And I've had many years of grace

And it flatters me when I see a smile on your face

I wanna thank you for what you've done

In hopes I can give back to you

And be the perfect son

[Chorus]

You showed me how to love

You showed me how to care

And you showed me that you would always be there

I wanna thank you for that time

And I'm proud to say you're mine

[Chorus]

Cuz mom you always were,

Mom you always were

Mom you always were,

You know you always were

Cuz mom you always were... the perfect fan

I love you Mom